Scandal: Where's the Black Lady

Girl...yo daddy told you!!!!!!!!!

I missed "Scandal" last night because I was out having BIG, BIG FUN so I'm currently sitting on the sofa watching it.  I missed watching it with my absolute FAVORITE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD though.

Secret Service just burst in talking some Vice President said this and that so we're going to "support" you.  Basically letting him know that private eyes are watching you...watching your every move....oh baby private eyes...watching you...watching your every move...

Lawd...poor Fitz looks bad.  He's in with his whipping boy AKA Melly.  You know whenever he's dealing with something he takes it out on her.   Oh shit...she dimed herself out about sleeping with the VP.  These people a mess!  They are trying to be like the Underwoods.  There is only one Frank and Claire baby and they'll be BACK FEBRUARY TWENTY SEVENTH!!!!!!!!

Andrew has a good head of hair.  Warmongers generally do.

Olivia's hair is authentic.  Big hair, don't care.

Her nails still on point though.  

Now Fitz...Imma need you to take that jump drive to Huck mmmkay?  Them White House people are NOT on your side.  Just tip on down to Cyrus' office and tell him to give it to Huck.  Huck will tear ish up looking for Olivia.

I used to love Portia...HUCK GOT HER AZZ!  YES!  YES!  YES!  HE'S IN THERE WITH YOUR KID!  GIRL YOU BETTER KNOW LIKE ME AND TELL HUCK WHAT HUCK NEEDS TO KNOW LE STAT!  HE WILL LICK YOUR FACE AND SLICE YOUR TEETH OUT!

Oh...VP Good Hair straight rouge.  Yall don't know any better.

Hey Tom!  

Oh...Tom went straight crazy in solitary huh?  

You can't trust anyone in the White House Fitz.  

Olivia's house ain't safe hell.  That's where they snatched her.  Okay...thumb drive to Jake.  Olivia's luhvah's are on it.  Jake took where it needed to be taken.  That glass is a sign right?

REFLECTION IN GLASS!!!!!!  GET IT OLIVIA!  GET.IT.OLIVIA!  Okay...whatever Huck just said...do that.  YES!

"President or not he's just a man."  Well...and then there's that.  

I hope Olivia Papa Pope's old dude's azz when Huck gets her out cuz Huck going get Olivia.  I feel it in my fingers...I feel it in my toes...Christmas is all around us...wait...sorry...moving on...

WHERE'S THE BLACK LADY?  

Did Quinn just call Ms. Rose, Rose?  GIRL...YOU'D BETTER HANG A HANDLE ON THAT BEFORE SHE SMACKS YOU WITH THAT BAG!

This VP dude has GOT.TO.GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...

UM...CYRUS?  Wait...Cyrus has those good instincts and now he has Red thinking.  But wait...why break the mug though?

Well...Huck going skin Portia alive most likely.

OH SHIT!  THAT WAS CREEPY!  

He brought the tool box.  Don't hurt the child Huck.  That isn't the answer.  I don't like that.  But you can snatch Porsha's teeth.  Not a problem.

TELL MELLY DUDE!!!!!  Melly can get to Andrew.

I hate when he talks about Olivia to his wife.  Stankin' azz.

VP Good Hair is going down-t.  All the men have a good head of hair though.  

I think Melly is our wild card here.  I think Melly can stab her.  

FLORENCE BROUGHT THE TIP THEY NEEDED!  YES!

Ooooh!  Yjr omyrtmry eo;; yto[ upi i[ rbrtu/domh;r/yo,r/

Oops...fingers were on wrong keys.  ROFL!  I meant...Oooooooh!  The internet will trip you up every.single.time!!!!!

HUCK!  GO GET OLIVIA!

Figure out some kinda way to tell Cyrus.  But he thinks he can't trust Cyrus either since he's in the White House right?

Papa Pope needs to come home hell.  Or Mama Pope.  Any of them Popes.  Know how we have one cousin who straight WrecksItRalph?  All her cousins prolly bad azz.  They prolly hold their family reunion in a boxing gym.  Instead of slinging bones they do mixed martial arts competitions from Granny on...

HOLY SHIT HUCK!  He stripped her azz raw!  Sheesh! 

Melly = Wild Card.  Watch and see.  In their twisted way...they all love each other for real. 

So Cyrus finally read the file huh?

Olivia...ask for one of those Dickie's jumpsuits.  I've always wanted one.  Flannel lined.  I don't know why.  Odd I know.

Olivia is playing this dude Olivia style.  She's killed once and now she's dangerous.  I just hope she remembers to keep holding the gun after she kills next time cuz really...this kidnapping could have been over by now had she saved that gun and wet his chest.  (I love talking thugish.  ROFL!)

MELLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Told yall Melly was the Wild Card!  Well...yall knew that already.  I'm the one watching late.  I hate yall for watching without me.  Yall are NOT my friends anymore.

Til next week.  GO.ME!

Jake go get your woman!  Well...yall woman.  JAKE DEA!  YES!

But she's not there.  She was too damn smart for her own good.  Had she stayed there instead of getting in old boy's head...Jake could have been carrying her out by now and we could all be swooning.  About Jake.  From State Farm.

Auctioning the Black lady.  

But I just had a thought...what if Papa Pope is behind the VP Good Hair??????  Yall know Roman likes to be the puppet master.  Hmmmmmmmm!

Thoughts?

My Solo "Scandal" Watch Party!

I can't stand when Olivia is laying on the shams.  Unless you change your shams and duvet cover weekly because you wash them...you shouldn't do that.

I like wine but I'm not drinking wine in bed especially when I have white bed linen.  I'm clumsy.  

Yall know I hate her and Fitz together so I wanted Mellie to roll out there with a lamp and smack the ish out of him.

I'm so sorry but I still don't like Quinn.

Wait this dude just offed himself in front of Quinn.  She ain't no beast.  She should have stopped that.

Diaper Senator.  ROFL!  HE POOPED HIS PANTS!  

Beating ex-hubby is the replacement?  OH HELL NO!!!!!  IDDA FLEW ACROSS THE ROOM YELLING OBSCENITIES!

Olivia's eyebrows?  EVERY.SINGLE.THING.

WHITE COAT.  So much yeah.

Dammit Red...get a gun hell.  Don't let that mofo scare you shit.  Tell what you know so those mofos can dump that dude.  YOU THREW UP ON YOUR CLOTHES?

Poor baby.  I feel sorry for her.

Shiiiiiiiiiiit...fug Hill votes.  I'd out his azz.  Or get Huck to visit him.

Olivia:  Abby...look at me...what do you want?

Monnie:  Shelly...what do you want?

Shelly:  You can't do anything.

Monnie:  *INSERT.EVIL.GRIN*  Just remember...don't ask me any questions.  Ever.

BESTIE RULES!

Say yes Susan.  SAY YES!

Did they just wax her lip?  LOL!  So much yes.  People...keep your lip waxed if you have hair on your lip.

Embassy bombing but Cyrus rolls out for a nooner?

Mellie.  I love me some Mellie.  And her white gloves on china.  LOL!  But if she lets old girl get in her head...she's going to go downhill fast.

I hate how Olivia treats David.  I hate how David always gets in the crosshairs.

Hey Tom!

I have a feeling Tom is going to be no more than an extra soon.  Papa Pope can't let the one man who knows the whole truth and nothing but the truth continue to live.

Is Tom smitten with Olivia too?  Olivia is THAT.CHICK.

She broke Fitz down to his brake pads huh?  LOL!

Fitz tried to off himself?  

Can we get Tom to start answering necessary ish?  

Imma start calling her azz HOT.  Helen of Troy.  Yup...HOT.

She told him right.  Papa Pope is gunning for him no matter what.  He simply can't be allowed to live.  He knows too much.

Susan is going to crack under the pressure.  LOL!

That kid?  Every.single.thing.  LOLOLOLOLOL!

Them bunny slippers?  OH.YEAH!  LOL!

Abby's ex in the garage?  Why didn't she tell Huck yet?  TELL HUCK!  HELL YEAH!  SHE HAS A GUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  SHOOT HIM!  SHOOT HIM!  SHOOT HIM!!!!!!!!!!

SHOOT HIM!  PTSD!  SHOOT HIM PLEASE SHOOT HIS AZZ!  I'VE NEVER WANTED ANYTHING MORE THAN I WANTED HER TO SHOOT HIS AZZ RIGHT NOW!

But um...how'd she get that gun in the car past security headed to White House parking?  Did she jump a fence?

I'd tell it Red.  I'd roll up on that podium and tell it.  I don't care about "where are they now" I'd tell it.  Holding my gun.  And I'd say...I will shoot that mofo if he ever comes near me again.

Fitz got that info about Jake from State Farm didn't he?  LOL!  HOT wasn't playing with his azz.  Olivia needs to tell him about the beater.  I don't like her pointy nails.  I don't like pointy nails.  Witchy Poo.

There goes the Fitz/Olivia music.  I hate that music. 

Are they havING phone sans ropas?  LOL!  Yall better write this ish!  BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  And then he hung up?  Left her hanging?  SERIOUSLY?  Girl...you'd better HOTfoot if over to the White House.  LOLOLOLOL!  I am DYING laughing!  That was pretty real.  Yall know it was.

Awwwwww...Baby Huck.

Cyrus...don't fall for the okey doke.

Did dude just call Susan an ugly egghead?  

TELL IT RED!  TELL IT!  Now shoot him too!

If I was Olivia and walked in on Papa Pope in my house...I'd turn around and leave.

UH.OH.SHOW.DOWN!

I hope she cuts his azz down to the quick.  That look in her eyes says she's about to.  GET.HIM!  (Papa Pope needs to get his teeth fixed.)  This entire show, from the beginning, has been about their relationship.  She fights against everything he's ever done.

Well...there goes Tom.  Knew that was going to go down.  

Mellie is letting that woman in her head.  Yall know she's about to say that tip right?  Right.

BAM.  Done.  

Cyrus' boy toy has to go.

Bye.Bye.Chuck!

So...sleazy boy has a heart?  I like that.  Red...don't fall for him.  UGH!  NO!  DAVID IS THE DUDE!

"Have some more bourbon and I'll touch your boob."  ROFL!  That made me burst out laughing.

Fitz/Mellie show down.  Is he going to tell her she was a pawn?

She's right.  She cracks for 2 months and he turns on her while she's been putting up with all of his shit forever.  I mean...his damn daddy raped her!

SO HAPPY THAT TOM FINALLY TOLD IT!

OLIVIA SET UP THAT HIT ON TOM?  HELL YEAH!

BABY HUCK IS A NATURAL!  YES!  YES!  YES!  MINI SPY!  SUPER SLEUTH!  PINT SIZED POPE!

GO GET JAKE OUTTA THERE!!!!!!!!!  GET YOUR MAN OLIVIA!  HEY JAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I MISSED YOU!  THREESOME!!!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I enjoy this show man.  I know it's just a glorified soap opera that is unbelievable as hell but BAAAAAAAAAAABY...I ENJOY THE HELL OUT OF IT!  LOL!