How do you reconcile being disappointed with a TRUE loved one?


I’ve recently had to ask myself the question of what I should do when disappointed with a loved one. Someone you REALLY love and would move mountains for. Someone you’d drop everything to rush to their side in times of challenge for them. What do you do? It’s not like you can cut them off because you love them and they love you, you’re simply disappointed in them for a particular reason that goes against your personal belief system.

I guess this has come up a lot in recent years regarding politics. Your belief system might go against a loved ones strongly on a particular issue. I mean…none of us should be one issue people but, if we’re honest, there are a few issues that would REALLY make it hard to reconcile if you found out a loved one staunchly opposed that you supported and vice versa, right?

So what do you do? Do you pretend that everything is fine and just skip over the disappointment? Do you say something knowing it will become a hot debate? Do you just have to learn how to accept PRICKLY warts and all?

I am struggling with this. After yelling at a loved one for 15 solid minutes I feel VERY unsettled. I developed a migraine last night and woke up with it this morning so some of the way I feel has to do with the migraine too, I’m sure, but my disappointment has my stomach in knots.

My husband says it’s my fault because I simply have to learn how to not expect people to be as amazing as I think and hope they are. That is a truly depressing thought for me. *sigh*

What do YOU do? What would your advice for me be? How do I reconcile this feeling without too much damage to my heart and to the relationship? How do I not get to the point as say fug it and fade them to black knowing it will hurt me too?

Thank you in advance.

The Mundane and Me

The struggle to be your own version of great can be oh, so real. Sometimes, even the simplest of things like getting out of bed, putting gas in your car or folding clothes can get the best of you. I’m a great list maker. My follow through suffers on anything that isn’t a passion for me. The benign tasks of everyday life seem to not be what I’m here for...and yet...they continue to be necessary to do.
— Monica Mingo, January 2015

Someone I love left something they love at my house.  They know good and well that I'm not the kind of person who ships or mails stuff.  I don't know why really...I just never seem to be able to follow through with that.  I feel bad about it but I can't change it.  No matter what.

Prior to them leaving my house I told them to double check to see if they left anything.  We laughed remembering that I hate shipping stuff.  Thirty minutes after they'd left...I was cleaning up and found the thing they love.


They set me up for failure.

I put the thing at the front door so I wouldn't forget to ship it back to them and, within a few days, I went to ship it but the place I went couldn't guarantee that it wouldn't be broken when it arrived because they didn't have the supplies needed to send it according to what their list said they'd need.


So I brought it back home with every intention of shipping it from New Orleans.  Well...when I was next in New Orleans, I ended up getting to the city too late to ship it from the place near where I was going to be.


Then it was going to go back with a mutual friend, but the mutual friend and I didn't get together when we said we'd get together so I couldn't hand it off.'s been back where it's been.  And it's been added to.  I've added a couple of gifts to it but hell...makes no nevermind when it's still here and not THERE.

And I pass by it

But the only time I think about it is the brief second my eyes light on it.

I don't know why this is a constant in my life and I swear I've tried my best to be better at it.  You have no idea how much stuff I found when I was packing up 13700 that I'd purchased for someone I love.  Clothes that children I purchased them for have outgrown.  Fabulous gifts for fabulous people because I only buy things for people I love that I would buy for myself.  

I'm not proud of this.  I'm truly not.  But the good Lord Himself knows that it will probably always happen.  It's my negative THING.  The thing I can't shake no matter what.

Unless I have a PASSION for it, I have no desire to do it and seems to never get done.  *sigh*

Anyone else have this issue?

Or is it just me?