Marriage...What's it worth to you?


I hear a lot about unhappily married people.  And what I don't hear, I can read between the lines and make an educated guess about even though I know I'll never know for sure if my guess was correct or not.

A friend posted that meme on Facebook and I'm hoping the woman pictured told him no because there is nothing joyous in her face about this proposal at all.  This is a sign of even more misery to come.  See...being proposed to should bring about some happiness right?  And it looks like she is seriously contemplating some ish he did recently that makes her second guess her love for him and vice versa.

This reminds me of that video by Tyrese with Taraji in it where he did all kinds of miscreant nonsense he is apologizing to her for doing and only when she was packed up to leave him with their SCHOOL AGE child, did he fall to his knee and propose in a last ditch effort to keep her.  Proposing shouldn't be a last ditch effort.  It should be what you've been building towards as a couple.  It should have been clearly stated that both of you are interested in being married one day.  And both of you should have been acting like that's what you were working towards by respecting the relationship and each other.

If dude has ever, at any time, told you that he's not getting married, don't expect him to pop the question and make you officially his partner in life.  Don't think, for an instant that he will change no matter how much yall have been through.  He has already told you where he stands on marriage so if you want to get married...he might not be the one.

Now, of course, we've all heard of the couple where the man was adamant that he wasn't getting married but she gave him an ultimatum and he broke down and did it.  To that I  You're good with having to DEMAND he do what a man should WANT to do?  With the natural progression of being a mature adult?  Of being the man of your household?  

I know you probably imagine a wonderful loving life as a wife and his missing rib but do you really think that a man who doesn't respect the institution of marriage is going to change if you force him to marry you?

The look on old girl's face is saying a whole lot of how she feels in her heart.  She's not happy.  She's been hurt.  She doesn't want to embarrass him and she wishes it were the real, genuine deal she's dreamed about...but she knows she won't have the marriage she wants with this guy.

But she will probably say yes and be in a marriage in name only as the spirit of the union will be lost in his continued behavior.  The kind of man who never grows up and is simply a pubescent child in a man's body with all the nonsense that comes along with that.

Take your time, don't put up with any bullshit because once you do...the bullshit will keep coming since there were no severe repercussions the last time you were presented with the bullshit. 

You'd be much happier on your own living in peace of your own making.  I know lots of women who are happy, well traveled and loving life.  Life is the longest thing you'll do.  Don't let a fool make it miserable.