To my knowledge, no one I used to date came out of the closet later in life. They went on to marry women and start families. Not everyone can say that with sexuality in the South still being something hidden if you live what they consider an "alternate" lifestyle. I know a couple who were both gay and decided to get married, adopt kids and be a family. They are rumored to have side pieces but it's all uber discreet. "Honey I'm going play racquetball." "Excellent honey! On Saturday I'm going shopping."
If it works for them...not my circus, not my monkeys.
Last night on the Viola Davis show, a young woman in law school found out that her fiance slid swords with one of her classmates when they were 16 at a prep/boarding school they both attended. *BLINK* The way it came out, all in public, outside in the open...would have made me jump crazy right then and there. The first time it came up would have been a resolution to the conversation RAT.THERE. Wouldn't have been no speculation. I would have known EXACTLY what old boy meant when he said, "Looks like we have more in common than we thought."
Here's how that would have gone down with me:
EXT - PORCH OF HOUSE - DAY
Monnie and her fiance are hugging on the porch as her colleagues come out of the house.
Everyone, I'd like you to me my fiance Booty-Boo. He's the governor's lacky.
Be late again and you fail.
Booty-Boo! I miss you! Come back to me!
It sure is nice to see you. Now go 'head on now...
Looks like we have more in common than we thought.
What the fug you mean 'bout that? Booty-Boo! What the fug he mean?
Monnie we can talk about this later. It was nothing.
Oh hell no! You used to be gay? I know your azz didn't! Classmate! What the hell!
Yeah...I had your man.
Da hell yall doing? This is unprofessional!
Viola...check yo' wig...I need to handle this shit RAT.NAH! This mofo used to be gay and I have a hoity-toity dress that is the cost of my meal plan for 3 years.
Oh...used-to-be gay huh? Girl...handle that. You gotta be wise about who you marry. I married this White dude who be tipping out and well...
See...couldn't be me. Idda kept his ring, bought me some wine and went to my people and laid low for a minute while he got his ish out my house so my heart didn't break completely to pieces. I'm of the mind that people who are gay are gay. You're not going to be in a relationship with me mad because you couldn't be who you really are. You'll start taking ish out on me that ain't got nothing to do with me. I'd be like, "Honey, you want to go out to eat?" And you're all, "Leave me alone! You're ugly! Do something with yourself!"
I know someone who married someone who used-to-be-gay. She didn't know and he had to keep coming up with new reasons why he couldn't um...erra...perform. He made her so insecure, she shrunk and became this old mousy looking woman. When it finally came out she was furious he tried to "put that ish on me Ricky Bobby!" She probably still in therapy for the job he did to her.
Like...I know of men who are cheating who pick fights with their wives so they can tip out mad so just imagine.
That said, what would YOU have done in her situation? Could you marry a man who neglected to tell you of a homosexual experience he had and then you found out about? Do you think men can have homosexual experiences and not be gay?