I'm Not a Racist. I'm Salty.

I wasn't very surprised at the Academy Award nominations.  Did I think Kevin Hart was going to get a nod for his role in "Get Hard?"  No.  I didn't.

Who in the world is going to argue that Cate Blanchett and Leonardo DiCaprio don't deserve awards for their performances?  Crazy people ONLY cuz yeah...they brought it as they always do.  Matt Damon in "The Martian?"  Dude did that.  I loved that movie and loved his performance.  Very seldom do I enjoy a movie as much as I enjoyed the book and I did here.

No surprise.

I haven't seen "Room" yet but from what I understand, Brie Larson showed out.  She prepped for 8 months for that role and I'm kinda scared at what that means based on what I know the movie to be about.  I'm sure she was paid enough to not miss a mortgage payment in those 8 months of prep work too. You'd expect that right?  Hell...I hope so.

I'll be honest when I say I didn't really think Jennifer Lawrence was going to get a nod for her performance in "Joy."  Not that I don't like Jennifer Lawrence because I've truly loved all of her previous performances but I just didn't care for the "slowed down" version of her that was in this movie.  I mean I know an actress has to show range in all of their projects...it just didn't do it for me and hell...what do I know and yeah...she's the current golden girl so I wasn't surprised.

I'm also not stupid.  

I know there weren't a lot of movies with Black people in them again so I wasn't expecting more representation during the nominations.  There was "Creed," and "Straight Outta Compton."  Those were pretty much the only two widely released films with significant roles for Black people in them directed by Black people.  Both good movies...to me.  Did I expect "Straight Outta Compton" to get more nods?  Honestly...no.  But "Creed?"  Yeah...I did.

I'm constantly trolling The New York Times' Opinion Facebook page and read comments I expected to read about the "blacklash" regarding the nominations.  And a lot of people didn't seem to get it.  I'm talking White AND Black people.

It's not about the nominations.  I honestly hope they really try and be inclusive.   It's about the filmmakers and casting directors and the people with the clout to greenlight films.  It's about OPPORTUNITY.  

One commenter got a lot of likes for saying something like...it's about talent.  If you're not talented, you don't get nominated, simple.  People were like...YEAH!  SAY THAT!  NO AFFIRMATIVE ACTION IN MOVIES!  

And I rolled my eyes because...DUH...it is about talent and, more importantly...the opportunity to showcase that talent.  You can be as talented as Denzel, Cate and Leonardo but if you're not getting the opportunity to show  you're talented...THEN WHO IN THE HELL KNOWS YOU'RE TALENTED EXCEPT FOR YOUR MAMA???????????

So yeah...I was/am salty.  All of that talk that went on last year based on the success of the first season of "Empire" which blew the viewing numbers out of the water was just that...TALK.  While folks were talking and celebrating yet another magazine cover with a Black actor on it, movies were in full post-production about to be rolled out for awards season.  The same names had the same opportunities to show how great they are.  The same names DIDN'T have opportunities.  

Same old, same old.

I was only surprised that so many people were surprised.

Still doesn't mean I wasn't salty though.

What say you?  Were you surprised?  Were you salty?  Do you care?

FIFTY PERCENT OFF DAWG!!!!! GO ME!

I was in Target the other day doing what we all do in Target...roam around looking for ish to buy with that red sale dot that we don't need to buy but it's super cute and it's on sale and well...it's really, really cute and really, really cheap.

Yall know how Target sets us up for failure.  Humph.

Well...I rounded a corner and saw this:

Patio umbrellas?  Rugs?  50% off?  I AM SO HERE FOR THAT!!!!!  I snapped a quick pic and sent it to Robby and then to my sister because I knew she'd been looking for one.  Then I sent it to a few girlfriends in the event they were too.  I mean...I NEVER find umbrellas for 50% off.  The most I ever see is 30% off.  I AM HERE FOR A SALE!  I'd been saying we needed to get one but then I was like...do I need to add to the stuff we have to move soon but again...for 50% off...NO.BRAINER.

So I made my decision wisely.  Picked a nice neutral color, rustproof, etc. Basically...I got the most expensive one they had.  Why?  FIFTY PERCENT OFF DAWG!  OH YEAH!

I'm damn near skipping to the register.  The  young lady scans it and I note the price didn't reflect FIFTY PERCENT OFF DAWG!!!!!  OH YEAH! Me...the signs say 50% off.  Her...um...  So, I show her the picture.  She makes her light flash.  Manager comes over.  Manager leaves.  Manager comes back, hits a few buttons and makes the umbrella price FIFTY PERCENT OFF DAWG!  OH YEAH!

Manager:  It's supposed to only be the rugs but it's not your fault.

Me:  *BLINK*  So...it's NOT fifty percent off (no caps)?

Manager:  *sigh*  No.  They were supposed to separate the rugs from the umbrellas and only put the signs on the rugs.  

Me:  Damn.  Sorry.  So...

Manager:  Enjoy your umbrella.

And I drove my cart out slowly, hesitantly.  Dragging my feet.  Called Robby.  Told him.

Him:  FIFTY PERCENT OFF DAWG!

Me:  (getting excited again)  Yup!

Him:  AWESOME!

So I came home, put up my new patio umbrella, made me a good lunch and sat outside to enjoy it under the lovely new shade created by my umbrella which was FIFTY PERCENT OFF DAWG!

And then the flies came.  

It was hot as hell.  

I dropped my damn big piece of chicken swatting away flies cuz know what else likes damn shade outside in the damn heat?  YOU GUESSED IT!  FLIES!  DAMN FLIES!

I had to change clothes cuz it was really humid as hell outside and the big piece of chicken was barbeque and now I had a damn stain on my t-shirt AND my shorts where the damn chicken rolled down and then I had to go out and get a damn fly trap cuz seriously???????  I HATE FLIES!  I HATE FLIES!  DIE!  JUST DIE!!!!!

So I picked a cute one. (THIS ONE) That could hang from my new umbrella.  And then maybe I could enjoy the damn thing.

Now that I think about it...it just might be jinxed.  You know...cuz it wasn't FIFTY PERCENT OFF DAWG!

*sigh*

go.me. (no caps)

Has this ever happened to you?  Did you feel guilty?

Pool Party + Police = Dammit I'm tired hell!

When I'm at a pool, I act a donkey's butt.  I love pools.  I'm not around pools often so when I am...WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  SPLASH!  AND WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE SOME MORE!

When I was a teenager and around a pool?  YAAAAAAAAAAAAS!  SPLASH!  SPLASH!  SPLASH!

Kids and teenagers act like kids and teenagers around pools.  Pool parties are not tea parties.  Nobody is sitting around with their pinky out messing up some crumpets.  They are fun and loud and filled with laughter, music etc.

That's what goes on at pool parties.

Now...I don't know who the hell, what the hell nor do I know all the hells...but this nonsense regarding calling police on kids really needs to stop.  Call the parents.  Unless you FOR REAL feel like your life is danger...don't call the police on kids.  For a few reasons.  First off...we've all been kids.  We've all done really stupid things as kids.  Things we would never do today.  It's called maturing.  Most of us seem to do that pretty well with guidance from our Elders.  Getting police involved in silly teenager ish just seems silly.  Police have enough on their hands dealing with FOR REAL crime and criminals.  A pool party getting loud?  COME ON PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!  Think about the pool parties you've attended...how many of them were in the library?  How many of them were filled with quiet people reading books?  The best pool parties of your life...did anybody get shot up?  Anybody died?  Was their looting?  Mass murder-ation?    Was there straight up debauchery going down?  (Well...there prolly was.  Yall know there is always a group of at least three girls in heels with the itty-bittiest of bikinis on stunting on land cuz they AIN'T getting in the water...)  LOL!  N.E.WAY!!!!!!!!!

Pool parties.

Yeah.

So...what was going down wrong?  Well...according to what I've read, the party was at the community pool of the subdivision.  According to HOA rules...each household can only have 2 guests.  Well...according to the young lady who threw the cookout/pool party...most of the attendees were residents of the subdivision and they'd all attended school together.

But the young lady could have said that because she was reminded of the HOA rules.  Now...let's backtrack here...I'm on the phone currently with Dr. Punkin and I just said...well...you know if we were teenagers rolling around and somebody called us and told us such-and-such was having a pool party what would we do?  

Dr. Punkin:  Go to the pool party!  

Me:  Yup.  Her mama make good potato salad!

And we laughed because really...that seems to be all you can do these days when something like this comes up.  You discuss, find something to laugh about and keep reading about it  cuz really...da hell we gonna do about it?  We know how we feel about calling police on kids.  It's not something we do unless we honestly felt our life was in danger from a kid.

Now...community pools have rules so yeah...you gotta do what the people say do right?  AND...if you want to have a party...your HOA should have guidelines you can follow to be allowed to do so right?

Right.

Okay...so...there were Black kids and White kids at the party...but the only kids being targeted were Black.

When I first saw the video the volume was turned off.  I saw this policeman roll on the ground like he was doing a stunt for a movie and start running after kids.  I then saw other policemen acting like policemen should act and turned on the volume.  They were TALKING to the kids trying to figure out who should be there and who shouldn't.  One police officer was basically telling the kids to not take off running when they see police and I'm thinking...um...I don't want any parts of kids being around police with guns so I don't want them running either.  I'd prefer they backed away slowly and got home SAFE.

Yup.

The dude leaping through the sky like a ninjacop?  He was totally doing the most-est-er-est.

But hey...back to the pool party people.  No weapons are being concealed in bathing suits.  Bathing suits worn by KIDS.

It seems that some people chilling at the pool took issue to all the kids being at the pool.  They were chilling.  Nice day for the pool.  Hell...they pay for that pool too you know...and here comes a bunch of loud kids cutting the fool at their pool.  Now...had the kids been kids they were familiar with it makes you wonder if they'd just look up annoyed and say something along the lines of..."Stupid kids" and left to grab lunch out or just open a bottle of wine and chill out at home.  You never ever know.  

But...if the teen's account of one of the women telling them to go back to their Section 8 housing is accurate...well...I'm not surprised things got out of hand.  I'm not surprised tempers flared.  I'm not surprised it turned into a racially driven situation.

Now...the young lady on the ground?  I'm feeling some kinda way about that.  Why he needed to even touch her was beyond me.  I mean...I guess more is going to come out about it all...but yeah...a 15 year old girl in a bikini isn't a threat worth responding to with physical violence.  When she sat up and started hitting her words by popping them into her hand with the other however?  I knew it was gonna go down-t soon.  She was emphasizing that her mother was going to handle this ish with the swiftness.

I kept watching hoping she'd stop talking.  Hoping it wouldn't escalate.  Hoping that nobody would get killed.  

Someone sent me a message asking if I'd seen the video and what my thoughts were regarding.  I told him that honestly...it just made my already tired heart even more weary.  

Just like a few good kids can spoil a pool party for everyone...just as a few jerky adults can spoil relationships between kids and adults...ONE weirdo acting cop made all the rest look bad even though the other cops seemed to be doing the right thing.

But...what do we do?  What can we do?  I'm sitting here about to finish reading my book.  If yall think of something EFFECTIVE besides my writing about it...let me know.  

Oh...and don't call the police on kids.  Call parents on kids unless you feel your life is in danger.  Don't make a kid jaded too soon.  Kids?  If a police officer tells you to do something...do it.  Get home safe.  The adults who love you will sort it all out once you're home safe.

Thanks in advance.

THOUGHTS?????

Scenario from real life...

It's dinner time and there are leftovers.

Two people.

Person A warms their food in the microwave and then puts person B's food in the microwave.

Person A...let's call him Robby, sits down to eat his food.

Gets REAAAAAAAAAAAL comfortable with it.

Then...he realizes his food isn't as hot as it should be.

Person B...let's call her Monnie, is waiting for her food to warm properly.

Should Robby...

A.)  Wait until Monnie's food is warmed properly, let her get her food and then put his food back in the microwave?

B.)  Take Monnie's food out before it's finished, put his food in, heats his food properly, removes his food and put Monnie's food back in to finish heating properly talking some...BUT I WAS ALREADY EATING!!!!!!!!!

THANK YOU IN ADVANCE FOR YOUR ANSWER.

New Universal Rule!

This frustrates me beyond reason so the people I talk to regularly on the phone know this is what we do.  If I called you and the call drops while we're talking...I will be the one who calls back.  If you called me and the call drops while we're talking...you should be the one who calls back cuz if I get voicemail more than once...I'm so annoyed I won't even remember what we were talking about.  LOL!

What about you?  Does this frustrate you too?